Why Real Coaches Are More Than Cheerleaders.

It’s a common misconception: the idea that coaches should be their clients’ biggest cheerleaders, always providing endless positivity. Sure, I’ve been there. Early in my coaching journey, I saw myself giving clients what they wanted to hear, thinking it would keep them motivated. But here’s the thing—coaching isn’t about telling people they’re great at every step. It’s about helping them get real with their goals, pushing through tough spots, and facing the truth. And sometimes, that truth isn’t comfortable.

Great coaching is about finding balance—the line between offering support and fostering real growth. This balance is what separates genuine coaches from.

The Fine Line Between Support and Growth:

Let’s talk about the difference between cheerleading and real coaching—and why the best coaches don’t simply cheer you on; they get you to step up and push beyond what you think you’re capable of.

Cheerleading vs. Coaching—Knowing the Difference.

Cheerleading feels good in the moment, but it rarely leads to meaningful results. Effective coaching requires a deeper, more challenging approach.

Why Cheerleading Falls Short:

When I first started coaching, I felt like I had to be the “nice guy” every client wanted. My approach was supportive and enthusiastic—but a bit too lenient. I’d find myself saying, “Great job!” after every session, even if deep down I knew my clients could do better. At the time, I hadn’t fully embraced the concept of radical candor. True radical candor isn’t about blanket praise or tiptoeing around hard truths. It’s about delivering feedback with honesty and respect, pushing clients to stretch beyond their comfort zones and not letting them settle for “good enough.” Looking back, my well-intentioned cheerleading was missing the mark—what my clients really needed was someone willing to push them to their fullest potential.

The truth hit me hard in one particular session when I realized my constant reassurance was creating more comfort than growth. My client, a promising manager, needed to sharpen their communication skills, but I’d been so focused on encouragement that I hadn’t pushed them to recognize the areas they were missing. From that day forward, I stopped acting as a cheerleader and committed to becoming a real coach.

Why True Coaches Don’t Just Say ‘Great Job’.

For growth to happen, clients need honesty—not empty praise. Tough truths pave the way for lasting transformation.

The Power of Honest Feedback:

Authentic coaching demands real feedback, not empty praise. Early on, I’d give clients positive feedback to keep sessions light and energizing, but this approach soon backfired. Clients would leave feeling motivated, only to find themselves stuck, week after week, with the same issues because growth requires more than feel-good moments—it requires tough truths.

One of the hardest but most rewarding lessons I learned was with a client who had big dreams but was constantly sabotaging their own progress with poor time management. It was tempting to soften the blow, but I chose to be blunt. I laid out exactly where they were falling short—and what needed to change. It was uncomfortable, sure, but the results were powerful.

The Power of Constructive Criticism in Coaching.

Criticism is often misunderstood as negativity. However, in the right hands, constructive criticism becomes a powerful tool for empowerment.

Constructive Criticism Builds Stronger Leaders:

Constructive criticism doesn’t mean tearing people down—it’s about helping them build a stronger foundation. I’ve coached high-level executives and rising managers who were used to others skirting around hard truths, expecting more of the same from me. But to make real progress, I knew I had to approach things differently.

One client, a talented but self-critical executive, constantly felt like they were falling short. In our sessions, I highlighted areas for improvement, but I didn’t shy away from calling out unproductive habits either. We didn’t waste time on false praise. Instead, we worked through each challenge with unfiltered honesty. That’s when the real change started happening.

Encouragement Without Blind Optimism.

Optimism isn’t about glossing over challenges—it’s about inspiring clients to move forward with clarity and purpose.

Optimism That Drives Change:

Coaching requires optimism with a dose of realism. I’m a believer in the importance of recognizing wins, no matter how small. But here’s where coaching differs: we don’t stop there. We keep pushing forward.

In one particular session, I celebrated a client’s success in leading their first big project, but I immediately challenged them to think bigger. We set up the next milestone and raised the bar, so they never got too comfortable with their current success. This balance of encouragement and challenge is what coaching is all about.

Long-Term Impact of Honest, Non-Cheerleading Coaching.

While tough coaching can be uncomfortable, its impact is undeniable. Over time, it builds resilience and fosters sustainable success.

The Long-Term Benefits of Tough Coaching:

A few years into my coaching journey, I began to see the fruits of this approach. The clients who stayed committed to the tough-love feedback weren’t just succeeding—they were thriving, showing resilience, adaptability, and growth in ways that would have been impossible with only cheerleading.

When you’re willing to move past surface-level praise, clients experience:

• Greater Self-Awareness – They recognize where they excel and where they need to work, empowering them to make real strides.
• Resilience – Clients who receive honest feedback develop a higher tolerance for the discomfort that often accompanies growth. They learn to thrive under pressure.
• Sustainable Growth – Unlike feel-good pep talks, real coaching yields long-term results that clients can take beyond their sessions and apply to every area of their work.

Coaches Aren’t Cheerleaders—and That’s a Good Thing.

So, here’s the takeaway: coaching isn’t about blind support; it’s about guiding clients toward real transformation. True coaches provide a roadmap to success, holding clients accountable, challenging their comfort zones, and preparing them for whatever comes next.

When I stopped being just a cheerleader and became a true coach, my clients began experiencing real growth. Coaching isn’t about making someone feel good in the moment—it’s about building the skills and resilience that support lasting change. It’s tough, it’s rewarding, and it makes all the difference between short-lived wins and genuine, sustained success.